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Sunday, July 19, 2009

well short outing with bf today...
suppose to go to cathay to buy my laptop casing...
but the moment i tell him the place...
i know it was quite impossible for me to go alr...
yea... that weirdo doesn't like to go to orchard...
but... cathay is not even in orchard...
its off orchard for sakes...
LOL.
oh well...
stuck to my bloody east side which is so bloody boring...
and going shopping basically is to look at things and even if you dun buy you still can say you feel like buying just for fun...
oh well kno what...
he doesn't like it at all...
totally out of this world...
LOL
yea... going to shopping malls and shop and all different outings just made me have this very strong feeling that we are from two different world that we can't click most of the time...
he just can't accomodate with the outing to orchard not even OFF orchard...
not bugis on weekends...
oh well where else in singapore can we go...
only his house i guess and tampines and pasir ris...
LOL
cause its all near to his house...
we make a big difference and it seems like being together was just wrong...
or maybe i am used to being pampered cause im the only child...
but no matter what you would think for other people although it was my thing and you got to get other ppl in and help them..
oh well...
what is this...
i know i am self-centred... so???
im brought up like that...
i don't know how to share...
and don't try to teach me or ask me to learn cause i will never do so...
sad to say you think more for those ppl ard you and just that little bit for me...
but those ppl that you thought of and ask me to help have they thought of me before...
er i suppose not eh...
lol.
im just being selfish kaes...
i dun like to think for other ppl eh...
and sending you off you just walk off like that eh...
WOW...
best one...
other ppl will help their gf and think for them and care for them and love them and work to earn money for them...
but you...
help me i dun dare to think.... think for me more like think for others around you...
care for me once in a while... love me if you are in the mood eh...
work not for me but ya to clear your friend's debt...
which is so called your debt...
i can really see your effort in loving me eh...
always say im important to you...
but i think when your friend is in trouble they are more important...
ya i know why...
cause i want money to spend... thats why you dun see the need of helping me...
oh well i will never get anything from you eh... going shopping is an offence?
buying clothes is an offence?
just because your previous gf can stay at home, your friend's gf can stay at home and not go out so i must be like them?
why must i be so deprived..
i know... want to go out can... spend my own money and go out with my friends not you right...
cause you won't allow me to buy things cause i need to save money...
for what fuck...
i don't even know when i will die...
save the money to bring into my coffin???
LOL
touch your heart and ask yourself what have you really done for me?
and have you pamper me before?
you know for almost one year the only happy day i rmb was only one pathetic day at plaza sing...
thats was the only day when i was really happy...
and it just ended there...
i don't expect 365 days of that but can i have mojority of the days we spend together to be like that day...
and you work cause you need to help your friend's clear debt... den how about the debt that i owe...
partly was also your responsibility eh...
i had to find money and now i got to clear the debt myself...
but some other ppl you help her pay eh...
dun need me to tell you who i think you know... your beloved one...
everything i got to try to solve it myself...
the other day almost wanted me to go to the clinic alone...
you can think of others can think for me or not?????
HOW I WISH YOU COULD LOVE ME MORE WITH HUGS AND KISSES...
OR MAYBE WE ARE JUST A MISTAKE...

yea cried again upon typing this post...
to my sister KIMBERLY...
really hope that you are with me now...
cause i know you will wipe away my tears and make me laugh...
really miss you la sister..!
must meet up soon kaes...
Love You! :D

Blogged at :
11:20:00 PM